In an astonishing feat that may place him well above the other Republican contenders for the 2012 presidential election, Newt Gingrich announced this week that he has learned math. “Addition today, subtraction tomorrow,” roared a boisterous Gingrich in a packed stadium during his S.C. tour. The former speaker, who is known [...]
In a move that stunned hundreds, Harold Banderton, FourSquare mayor of the local Wendy’s on University Blvd., has officially announced his candidacy for the upcoming presidential elections taking place in 2012. “I’ve done a lot of great things for the town of Wendy’s,” said the Democratic hopeful. “But, America needs [...]
Last Thursday, Domino’s filed the necessary paperwork with the SGA lobbying office to petition for more frequent SGA elections and revealed their new slogan, “Get The Door, It’s Democracy.” Domino’s desired election frequency is currently unknown, but an unconfirmed report claims Domino’s recently purchased four tons of dough, eight tons [...]
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